Hi there... you're in Group #1 for our Thanksgiving-New Years team.  Please see L2G's latest entry for more info. 

UGH, I feel for you I hate the holidays.
Everyone makes such a big deal about it.
Cooks this whole fat ass dinner, and everyone eats and gains like 10 pounds.
I'm a vegitarian so that helps me on the holidays.
Then all I eat is mashed potatoes or something.
I wish you luck, keep strong, think thin!

WEWT!
Kay rules:
NO FOOD, obs.
You can have chicken broth if you want.
Drink water/diet pop/anything else under 10 cals.
I have these juice mixes that are 5cals.
But not too much of that either...
Say up to 50 cals a day of everything.
And you can have celery cause it helps burn fat, so we will want to eat lots of that.

Lets start at 12-midnight, and go all day.
Then decide if we want to go for another day.
Alright?

Hey, thankyou for adding me to your favorites.
And to answer your question, I did write most of it, some lines are from a song though.

=D

hey girl!

you missed me??

:)

Lovess

Hellarockstar!!!

xxx

i can't find where you vote at. i found her picture and left a comment, but where do you vote.

she's really pretty:)

thankyouu :)

i love the last one,
its like, look at the excess fat on the arm :o

xxx

Lovely thinspo.

Is that one of those UV tatoos? Want one.

Muchlove...<3

That's some sick sh it.

no they haven't checked my tubes or ovaries. that's what i didn't understand, so this time i'm going it and demanding they check them.

non taken, i understand why you asked,lol. and yes i've had std testings done, and i'm clean. if i have scar tissue like i think i do it's from the prior pregnancy losses.

[TheLostAngel]

Hey :)

ermm conclealer?   cucumbers on eye lids?   extra sleep?

xx

in reguards to the other comment, maybe we really do want to look like that. who are you to tell us we don't want too. i know for a fact i'd love to look like tha, and will one day.

anyways love the thinspo. thanks.

stay strong starve on-fadingobsession

thank you so much. i added my babies to the site and did one for my brothers baby as well.

thank you for the poem, it meant so much to me. i cried for 30min. j had to come see why i was crying. it really touched me.

thank you for being here for me.

<3Juli

huni

i know how you feel

i'v had depreesion for years

stay strong

much love Amanda xxx

thanks so much huni

thatws just what i need

stay strong
much love Amanda xxx

I am so jealous of all of them,
and person below says that they are too skinny,
they are not!

cameron diaz&jessica alba are probably the same size tbqh.

Muchlove&support

Juicyx

sorry for commenting so much i just realise after i click send that i wated to say something eles..

i know you don't get pregnant during your monthly. i just had to make sure i was having one so i could get pregnant. last year i went 9months without one. no monthly, no ovulation.  ovulation is what lets you get pregnant. the dr had me on birth control for 2 months tobring back my cycles. it works. my last pill was wednesday, my period ended on friday. so we started to try again on sat. just incase i don't ovulate when the average person does[which is 14 days from cycle day 1, basicly 7 days after the end of your period]. we've previously tried for 29months. so i've read or been told every trick in the book at this point,lol.

thanks for the luck. sorry for commenting so many times..

<3 Juli

[fadingobsession]

thank you.

i told j this morning that this would be the last month. your statement confirmed it.

love ya-Juli

You are a really amazing person to go for so much, and I always admire single mums, especially ones who work full time!

Much love&support

Juicyx

Thanks for adding me :)

happy 100th entry lol

much love&support

Juicyx

im totally into laxitives. i stir it up between those and vomiting. so milk of mag really works? does it tast horrible? and where could i find it? lol

-me

Hi
how are u?
At the end of the month I'm leaving MDD
so I wont have any Ana support or anything
I really can't afford to loose the support I have on here
so if you could please give me addresses (snail mail)
and cell/mobile numbers
please I wont be able to access the net at all
no thinspo, no pro ana nothing
just me
thats why Ineed you guys to repliy
please please repliy I cant afford to loose such great freinds
stay strong
much love Amanda xxx

i wish you well.

<3

Lovess

Hellarockstar!

yeah it helps a little. i saw the word sour and smiled to myself. not because of the song but because all i want to eat right now is sour candies. not sure why but it seems to be a bit of a comfort food right now.

if i didnt say this before, im sorry for your loss.  you should just not eat breakfast if you aren't feeling up to it. i know its the last thing i want to do right now. *sigh*

**hugs**

sounds like tonight we are crying together.  How i find comfort in that i don't know.

but thank you for your comment.

i was 8 weeks.

aww thanks so much huni

stay strong

much love Amanda xxx

thanx for the comment...though I should have read it before i did whatever i did today(i tried to bust her and ended up with recieving a half hearted sorry and tears)(and no solution)...but thanx anyway...

What's the genre of the song?

DearGan

i haven't smoked for 6 days now.[yay mini-happy dance,lol]

love the thinspo. except for the edited lindsay lohan one. i hate the photo shopped thinspo because the girls didn't achieve perfection on their own it is air brushed,lol.....

stay strong-Juli

thanks huni these are really thinspiering

and they stopped me from binging

much love Amanda xxx

hey girll.

nice thinspo :)

Lovess

Hellarockstar!

no one ever checked it anymore si i started a new one for my eating habbits. my new one is sickwithshame.

thanks for letting me know you care. it made me feel special:)

i think that abortions can be a bad thing, but i still think that people need to think about it in depth why people get them. I mean, getting raped at 15 mid-education... i think i would consider it. Some people aren't grown up enough to handle a child.

I'm not all for abortions but I still think that we should support those who have had to go through it, for whatever reason that may be.

x

i've seen about all the abortion pictures on the net that there are. i'm very aginst abortions. thanks for the warning. i've used some of these pictures on my antiabortion myspace page i have. the smallest baby that lived was just a little bit bigger then my brothers son dakota. dakota was 7.5 inches long, and 6ounces, i think. he was born at 18weeks, he lived 2 whole hours on his own.  believe that the hospital could have kept him alive, but for my brothers sake i don't tall him.

the aborted baby in the picture is more like 12/13 weeks. i lost my twins at 11 weeks  days. the bigger one was a little bit smaller then that baby, the other one was half the size. i held them in my hand.

i can't stand people who think abortion is right because they aren't ready. that's no reason for an abortion. maybe, maybe if you were 100% going to die, like the dr says you have no chance of living and neither does the child then and only then is it maybe even okay.

thanks for commenting.

Just because they don't want there parents to find out? lovely.
I can kind of understand if it's rape or something but... :/ I still don't see right in killing an innocent life, I totally agree with you.
Take care,

lol those were cute. i love the Asian baby. and the clothes were super cute. yesterday my mom and i looked at some funny onesies. one said"eat,poop,sleep,repeat" and it looked like the recycle symbol. my mom loved it said she'd have to buy it soon,lol. i saw one with a stroller on it that said "that's how i roll". lol it's my fave.

i also like the maternity shirts like that. i have one with a roll on it that says bun in the oven. i'm getting the one that says, "i'm not fat i'm pregnant, what's your excuse". lmao, jason said i'll so have to where that one to work, because my ast.boss tosha is really big, and people randomly ask her when the baby is due, and she hasn't had a baby in 3 years,lol. she's laugh att he shirt though:) j said he'd buy it as soon as we get a positive test.

sorry i'm rambling. thanks honey you made me smile.

that's why i quit my other diary. while yes it might be a bit easier for recovery from my ed, it wouldn't help my depression or anxiety in the least bit. writing is what i do. since i was 12 i've come on here and wrote down everything that is going on, it helps me to get it all out. it's my relief. it's therapy to me. i type when know one around me will listen. sometimes writing is all i have. when i was trying to quit cutting [btw, that was a 6 years addiction, i've only slipped up maybe 6-8 times in 2 years] i came on here and wrote.

i know you're only trying to help. i understand the triggers, if you'd like or think it would help i'll not come on your dairy. that way you can type what you want with out censoring it for me. you can just come comment and update me on the parts i'm aloud to hear,lol.

thanks for talking to me, and thanks for the support.

<3 Juli

gah! i know the pill isn't the greatest! i was on the pill the last time i got pregnant.  i would hate for that dream to come true.  gah!

anyways, good luck on the losing weight! i hate having people who try to make you eat crap. unfortunately, justin likes fatty foods. i need to go shopping and he can eat what he wants and i'll eat healthy! 20 lbs and i should be where i want to be!

it's okay, i understand your concern. i called the dr back but the earliest they could see me is still the 28th. i think i'm going to take a home test, even though i've had a history of them being neg when it was really pos. i don't know, i'm probably not pregnant, it's probably just wishful thinking. i wasn't even thinking about it until that lady at church said she keeps feeling baby in the spirit[when she hugged me]. then i began to wonder. last night i dreamed i was at where i am in real life, not knowing if i'm preg or not, and i went to the dollar store and bought 3 test, they all came out lightly positive. i woke up and was like i know that won't happen. but it was a nice dream.

buy some weighed balls[the kind for walking], put between your knees and squeeze. it helps your inner thighs. lunges are good for your butt and you legs and so are squats[if you can do squats in high heels it's an even better work out]. reverse crunches are good for your lower belly. lay on the floor, put your feet toward the ceiling[legs closed], and lift your hips straight up.[off the ground]

AWWWW im glad to hear he is doing so well.  i hate that konnor is growing up. teething was a breeze w/ k-man, except for like 2 of them. and he bit - hard!! lol. isn't amazing to see them going from not being mobile then to crawling, rolling over, standing up and walking?!?! it makes me so happy and so sad at the same time!

and i'm NEVER too busy for my favs!

take care!

goodness gracious, what an @$$ hole!!! i would have told him off.. *shrugs* would it have been worth it? no. would you have felt better? probably.  regardless, im proud you bought them as a goal for yourself. its good motivation. i have a pair of old jeans that i am working towards. i can ALMOST button them. soooo exciting!!

how is your little man, by the way?

I love that you hung them up for motivation. Now make sure you prove him wrong. That irks the piss out of me when people make remarks about others as a way to make themselves feel better.

My (step)dad is the same way.... he poked fun at my weight growing up.

Same with my brother.... funny thing is that now my brother is getting a beer gut and love handles as well.

What goes around comes around.

i would of told him to go f*** himself

you show him

you show him you can get into those jeans :)

stay strong

Lovess

Hellarockstar

Yeah i think i will do that,

thanks :)

im gonna have a read through your diary.

xo.

don't skip breakfast.
thats all i got to say.

i'm sure if it's her, if she starts eating right, and making sure she goes to the dr, and does exactly what they say to make the right changes then the pregnancy might work out.

i've had 4 miscarriages[i got healthy for all of the pregnancies, 2 were caused by blows to the belly, 2 were spontaneous. the dr said probably because of how badly my uterus is tilted.] strangely enough none were from my ed...

well if it is her i hope everything works out as well.

i have half a cup of oj to raise it, then water down milk,lol. [funny you sugested, what i do,haha.]

thanks love.

you've already lost a good amount of weight, i'm sure you'll be able to get to 140.

don't let other people get you down girl.

stay strong-fadingobsession

You're actually slowing your metabolism way down by not eating and then binging. When you go without food, you lose weight, but it's muscle weight. Your body actually retains the fat cells, which is what you're trying to lose.

Go to www.theloseweightdiet.com. It helps you calculate how many calories you need to consume to maintain your weight, and all you have to do is subtract 500 calories a day to lose 1 pound a week, which is all fat weight and healthy too. Good luck!

hmm. i have that problem with my hubby eating. [lol he eats all the time, and it's always something i like]. i don't know i just put it in my head, if i cave i'll be fat forever. i keep saying to myself i need to stop complaining and do something about it.

it's hard when j eats in the same room and knows i'm not eating. i normally focus on something eles. [i guess that's hard to do in your situation considering you have to feed him because he's a child,lol, not  hubby] i always create scenarios in my head, like j will leave if i stay fat[even though he won't,lol] to kinda trick my mind into doing what i want. maybe you can do that, for example "the baby has to eat to live, but if i eat i'll get so fat i'll die[from obes reality health problems]". lol, i know it sounds stupid but when i make things extreme in my head it really seems to work.

thanks for commenting it ment a lot to me.

stay strong starve on-fadingobsession

Wow I'm sorry it's sucking. Happy twenty-first!

one other thing..

don't get obsessed with losing weight and counting calories. there is a very fine line between dieting and anorexia. i should know, i used to be anorexic.

oh, and allow yourself a goodie every now and then. they should not be forbidden, just used sparingly

ok im really done now, i promise. but if you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask.

First and foremost, BE CAREFUL!!! You can't go from normal calorie intake to 500 calories just like that.  This may be a little lengthy, so i'm sorry in advance.

I started a diet at the beginning of December. I have lost 30 lbs since.  All from counting calories and MINOR exercise, so it can be done. :) I guarantee you will lose your first 10-20 lbs pretty fast, then it will be slower.

You have to gradually work your way down to the calories you are suppose to be at.  Cut a couple hundred cals of your intake per day.  If you drop from normal to 500, your body is going to crash, and you will want to binge.  By gradually cutting them, your body won't know much of a difference.  The first week is going to be super tough, but you have to be strong.

JUST SAY NO!! lol. It's very hard, but you have to do it.  Let the people around you know that you are on a diet, and ask them polietly not to offer you crap.  If you can't help but going out, eat a salad.  That's probably the hardest thing for me to do, but it's your safest bet.  Also, i tend to eat tuna and crackers for lunch.  Good protein (i think) and the tuna is only like 80 cals per serving, same with the crackers.

FRUIT FRUIT FRUIT!! It's all about the fruits (and veggies). Also, a glass of water before each meal/snack will help you feel fuller, faster. Google calorie counters to find out how much calories are in whatever it is your eating - it helps detour you from bad foods. 

Keep a log of what you eat, your weight, etc.  Check weight weekly to see your progress.  If you lose a bit, you know what you are doing well. If you are exercising, log that as well.

Also, last tip, take multi vitamins daily.  Pre natal ones are the best.  This helps put vitamins and such into your body that you don't get enough of when you diet.  This will help with your energy levels and making sure, obviously, you are getting what you need.

Hope this all helps, and, again, sorry about it being so long.  GOOD LUCK!!!!

No one on here knows you or your situation and should not pass judgement until they do.  Hang in there. A mother's job is to protect her children, at whatever cost. 

Keep your head up, your baby needs you :)

Today is your lucky day. I am going to give you a free consultation that is going to change your life.

I am no lawyer, but I know a tad about human psyque. I would advice you to walk a bit on his shoes and be accountable for what you are doing.

Yeah, crazy at it sounds, if you poke the eye of a bull, chances are he is going to attack you. So the guy asks to see his son until April, just a month. He is not asking to keep his son forever, all he asks is for you to let him see his son a friggin' month till the next court meeting, but "no, sir, you don't boogie".

So after exercising all your power over him to be sure he suffers, you are afraid that he will do something back at you? Well, if he didn't he would most definitely be stupid. I mean, if you pee on me be sure I will crap on you!

And the worst part of this whole ordeal is that you care sh*t about your kid. Have you even consider for once what you kid's feelings are toward his father? I am talking out of my ass here, this is just a presumption, but if despite what he has done to you he is a good father, why would you PUNISH YOU SON for the failure of your marriage? A kid needs both parents, and you are depriving yours of his dad.

You need to learn how to separate your problems. If he did something against you, you should fix that problem in a separate court. A divorce requires agreements, and nothing is going to happen unless one of you cut some slack...and it may as well be you.

How about letting him have the visitations? How about cutting him some slack? How about leaving all that hate aside and think logical and strategically? Do you REALLY think you are going to get away if you abuse that guy? Let me tell you something, you leave him with nothing, and he has nothing to lose. He has nothing to lose "ergo" he can do whatever he wants, including killing the f***ing bitch who is sucking his life away through alimonies.

I have never being married, and I am definitely not trying to scare you. I do not know your husband but I do know men. We are practical beings. You can be the one to be fair, and since you believe in God I seem to remember God tells people to practice charity OR you can play it rough, hurt him as much as you can, and he will soon enough figure out that for less than a year of alimony payments...he does not even need to get his hands dirty; he can hire a professional for as little as $25k to get the job done for him, recover his kid and take back his life. And it will all look like an accident. This is all hypothetical, of course, but when you angry a man you can assume everything.

No matter what he did, just tend a hand. Give him the other cheek. Cut him a bit of slack and see how he reacts. Show your willingness to finish this ordeal in a peaceful way...or be ready to enter in a world were everything goes.

Good luck.

yeah i felt bad for a while that i even put konnor thru that. any of it, really. justin is still guilt tripping me and crap in a desperate attempt to get me back. he doesn't know about jj, and won't until i come back from seeing him.

i'm okay with the distance now since we haven't become so close. "the heart knows no distance"

everyone gets their happily ever after. i'm almost sure this is mine, but only time can truly tell and i'm not holding my breath as of yet. but in time, you will find yours too. just gotta keep a smile on your face.

We don't have any legal documentation for Konnor.  Justin never signed the birth certificate, so really it would be very hard for him to take Konnor and not give him back.  He doesn't stand a fighting chance either way, and he knows that.

Its ridiculous that your Justin is threatening crap like that!!! GAH!!! guys are dumb. 

The night before Justin and i broke up, we had a fight at his house. Konnor went to a corner, put his hands over his ears, and started crying. That's when i completely knew it was over. i couldn't put my son through that s**t!!!! or myself.

i hope things turn out well with you.  I hate this situation and i'm sure you do as well

its amazing how similar our stories are.

im sorry that justin is being suck a jerk about coming and seeing your son and not helping you at all!! thats really frustrating, and not very fair for you. it really should be a 50-50 thing.  my justin also likes to call and see what im doing and makes it a point to make sure i havent found someone else.

it makes me sick. guys are stupid.

stay strong missy! being a single mom is very hard, but you will make it if you keep your head up. for your own sanity and for your son as well.

If you need anything, let me know!!

Thankyou so much for the fantastic poem.

It made me realise how wonderful life  can be, and how many people would miss me.

Thankyou - you are the one who saved me from the brink, and trust me I was so close :)

[wonderlandgirl]

Ana is a cruel mistress. She doesn't want what is best for you, she is completely self-obsessed.
She feeds on the life of others, sucking their souls until they are emaciated (spelling) and lifeless.
She is twisted - her sense of beauty so distorted by images in the media she finds bones [those traditional symbolds of death] so alluring and aspires towards them.
Ana makes you scream in silent moments, and resents you abandoning her - but she is not a petulent child, she can be cast away if you hate her so much...
You can fight her. You can! I have so much faith in you.

YOU ARE RIGHT~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ GUTTONY IS A SIN.

I LOVE, "I REMEMBER MAMA' GREAT MOVIE!

TRY PILING UP ON THOSE LITTLE VEGGIES, AND MAYBE THEY WILL LEAVE YOU ALONE.

That is horrible what those people said to you in 6th grade and how they treated you in high school. I hope you didn't let them get to you.

Best of Wishes,

LibraVamp

You said:

the things that proove to me that there is a god that man can't duplicat an exact replica of: trees, animals, people, babies, the grass, thunder storms, and most of all me.

While it is true that man can't duplicate other objects, what "man" has already done; invented spray on skin, a formular that can make you live up to 100 years, a tequiniqe of heart surgery which involves stopping the heart then starting it back up again. These are "miracles" that man created.

even if you beleive that we came from monkeys don't you think if that were true then every once in a while our babies would look like monkeys, or even have more hair.

When gorillas evolved into human, they evolved completely. Over thousands of years, don't you think that would have been enough time to evolve properly and completely? Of course you wouldn't give birth to a baby that looks like an ape, babys are made from YOUR cells, which is why they tend to look like you. Humans can't breed ape. And human didn;t evolve from MONKEYS!! There is a distinct difference between monkeys and apes. it wouldn't have taken much longer for a species to evolve to something around 4 times it's size.

i no there are alot of bad things that happen, but there is just as much good in the world.

Is there? In the next say, 9 seconds a man will or has abducted a little girl. he will then rape, torture and kill this little girl. That is just BRILLIANT isn't it???!?!? (note my sarcasm) AND after mentioning free will in your comment on my entry, you can't reply to this comment insulting me, because it wasn't me it was my free will. AND if "God" gave man free will, then technicly it's "God's" fault that all this terrorism and murdering and such goes on in this world. I mean, this imaginary figment some call "God" would have had a choice to make. Give man free will and let them destroy the earth, watching his "perfect" children destroy everything he worked for, or not let them have free will and keep his earth nice and perfect and have a bunch of human-robots worship him. And answer me this: how could someone have just BEEN there? That's just unrealistic. Pus, consider this: I am 13. Not only can I spell better then you, I have typed this up in an effort to prove a vast majority of the Earth's population wrong. Compare that to someone talking about how man can't clone things.  O.o

You left this comment on DemolitionLover's diary:

why is that?  most people tell me it's because they can't see god. you can't see babies before they are born eather, but they are real.

These are the following reasons you can proof the existence of a babie before it is born:

• Pregnancy tests
• Symptons like morning sickness
• Missing a period
• Enlargment of the stomach
• Ultrasounds

Now prove God to me...

"read that a little more closely. it says someone you wouldn't have met if you hadn't been diverted. you have already met ryan."

i dont really get it, sorry....=]

but yah we're friends....and maybe he needs time....but idk

thanks tho,

<3 michelle

thanks

well....everyone wrote like, 3 page notes to each other all tthe time, and me and ryan did occasionally too.

i kno no ones perfect....but hes an ideal guy for ME!

i just dont kno how to talk to him anymor..we seem so distant now

<3 michelle

take you a pill, smoke you some ganja, take 1 shot of tequila, chased with lemon, and ask God to show you the truth.

[Anonymous]